Lately, the options for what to consume in the culture are simply overwhelming, and the algorithm is making it impossible to figure out what’s actually good. That’s where Cult Following comes in: CULTURED’s monthly advice column where Delia Cai offers a cultural diet expertly designed to respond to each letter-writer's needs, whether they’re seeking recommendations for what to watch, eat, read, listen to, or any combination thereof. Cult Following exists to help narrow down your choices but also to help all of us confront our inner anxieties about navigating the wild, beautiful world of art and culture.
This week, Delia offers expert advice on adult bildungsromans.
Dear Cult Following,
I graduated from college last spring, and I'm still living at home on the Upper West Side, babysitting and tutoring and looking for a full-time job. I feel like all my friends have started their lives, and I’m waiting for my turn. I'm trying not to get too discouraged, but it's hard. Can you recommend a book that will help me feel less alone? Maybe one that will transform me into the 2.0 version of myself, just by reading it??
Signed,
Adrift
Dear Adrift,
Unfortunately, I am just woo-woo enough to believe that personal transformation (especially of the 2.0 kind) is far too mysterious a process to be achieved through reading a single book. But I think what you’re looking for is, understandably, some comfort that you’re not alone in your early adulthood anxieties. I truly believe that one’s early twenties are an objectively confusing and terrifying time, especially since society leads us to believe that if we can only set things up perfectly at the beginning of our adult lives, the rest of it will be a smooth ride. (Spoiler alert: That’s absolutely not how it works—it’s more like a game of Chutes & Ladders, where anyone at any point can drop “back down” to square one.)
I think that’s why you’d find The Interestings by Meg Wolitzer to be a moving read. It’s a coming-of-age novel from 2013 about six teenagers who meet each other at an art camp in 1974, where they already start assessing who seems most talented or desirable. As the novel follows these characters through the decades, the protagonist, Jules Jacobson, wrestles with the envy she feels for her more talented friends—the “interesting” ones—and learns how to define what a good, fulfilling life entails for those of us who don’t have mansions or MacArthur grants. (It’s primarily set in New York, which is a bonus for you.) Wolitzer, the author, is always so funny and snarky, and this is one of my favorites of hers. I also love anything that follows characters across a lifespan because it helps me zoom out on my most pressing but passing fears. While you’re feeling stuck at your parents’ house, you may benefit from this novel’s long view of ambition and meaning; after all, it’s a marathon, not a sprint and all that.
The somewhat spoiler alert for The Interestings is that you’ll find, of course, that friendship and love are perhaps the only redeeming (or truly interesting) things about life. I don’t imagine you’re a stranger to Sally Rooney, but just in case you haven’t gotten around to her oeuvre, she is truly unrivalled on this sentiment. Her third novel, Beautiful World, Where Are You does a particularly poignant job of exploring the friendship between two women around your age (note that one much more “ahead” in life than the other). The language is as lovely and crisp as a favorite white T-shirt. I find that reading Rooney inevitably puts me in a dreamy, hopeful mood. Plus, the interiority of Rooney’s characters––much of which comes out as the two friends email each other their innermost thoughts back and forth––may be helpful for you, too. In my view, the most important factor in feeling personally fulfilled is nurturing a sense of curiosity. If you’re able to amuse yourself with your own thoughts and observations, the world immediately becomes a friendlier and funnier place. And that’s when the magic really begins to happen.
Are you keeping a journal? If so, I can’t recommend Sheila Heti’s The Alphabetical Diaries enough as inspiration. Heti’s also a favorite author of mine (and, naturally, one I envy a lot!), and she published this book only last year. The premise is quite funny: Heti took a decade’s worth of journals, cut out the best lines, and put them all in alphabetical order. The beauty is not only in the resulting sentences, but also in the way they reveal how recursive even the most brilliant people’s thoughts are. It turns out that all any of us do over the years, really, is worry about relationships and work and whether we’re doing it right. Seeing it all documented like that might move you to do some version of documentation yourself. I found it all incredibly heartening, and I think you will, too.
Do you have a question about how to enrich your cultural diet? Email cultfollowing@culturedmag.com.
